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Episode 21: Gender/Equity with Femily

Femily shares how she shifted her work to align with her core values about equity and justice. She also passionately speaks about what it takes for more women to be in leadership positions and how to step into your authentic voice.

About Femily

Femily is Silicon Valley's Gender/Equity Advisor and CEO of the Future Thought Leader Academy. It’s a 10 week program where she turns introverts into icons.

She was a management consultant helping regular businesses scale up and scale down. It was fun and interesting, but didn’t hit her core values about equity and justice. She decided to see if she could braid together her values with her skills in the work place. She created a methodology based on what the research said works and transitioned over to a gender equity focus.

Courage Up Moment

She was at her management consulting job and was sitting at a table of 11 men. There was a man who asked her across the table, “ Why did you decide to work outside the home? ” Of course he wasn’t asking the other men why they decided to work outside the home. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back. She turned the question back to him “I don’t know Bob. Why did you decide to work outside the home?” In that moment, she decided that this could not be her life. She started to really look at how she could make the switch.

Navigating the Transition

It was easy to figure out the logistics of how to get clients. It was hard to convince herself to charge enough, think of herself in this new way. Imposter syndrome reared its ugly head. For her to combat it, the voices will always be there, but it’s not letting the voices have a say. Now she can talk back to her inner voice and catch it in the moment.

Gender Inclusivity

At the system level it is broken if women are the reduced number that are being promoted.

What we can do is bond together with the people at your company who are also passionate about this and make systemic change. Expecting all leaders to be elevating women and tuning into diversity and inclusion, not just the women.

Currently Couraging Up

  • Embracing her nickname Femily. Which was given when she was a community organizer in Boston. It’s a smush of queer, fem, Emily.

  • She organized a panel across the political spectrum coming together to talk about not voting for Trump.


Don’t wait until you’re invited because you might not be invited

Don’t wait until you feel like an introvert

Don’t wait until you feel confident

Don’t wait until you feel like an expert


Dress and act like the position you want not next, but after the next one.

Courage Song:

Everything is Awesome by Tegan and Sara


The Memo by Minda Harts

Femily's Thought Leadership Course is now open! If you're interested, head over to her website and check it out!


Connect With Femily:

Instagram: @Femilyonthego

Connect With Ming:

Instagram: @mingshelby

Facebook: Ming Shelby

Listen to songs on the Courage Up Playlist!

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